Ok well today is travel day I’ve been up since about 5. Today instead of words upon words this will be an ongoing blog, since I will be traveling it just makes a bit more sense to do it like this. As things happen I’ll give the time and a little bit of elaboration to aid in my adventurous journey home. Last night I wrote in the log book at the apt so for anyone that will be staying here after me you will get some warm words and my contact info so if ever you need help with something or just need someone to talk to when bored my email is there for you :D.

9am GMT/3am EST:
It’s about 9 am right now I’m waiting on Dorde(pronounced George), the taxi driver for the dr’s, to get here and take me to the airport. I’m all packed to go otherwise sitting here with loose trousers on. My nads are a bit achy so I have my pain meds just in case as well as my sleep meds if I can’t rest on the long flight. Getting back on eastern time is going to be a pain in my ass but I’ll adjust in due time.

9:30am GMT/3:30am EST:
Dorde arrives and appears to be speaking with Marta’s father. He is a very nice man and helps me to the car. Dorde takes my bags and I get in the car. The cab is a station wagon, seems like a lot of people drive them here. The snow has melted and the sky’s are clear no flight delays I’ve already checked :). I’m walking and sitting perfectly I forgot I had surgery for a second but my pain meds are on hand just in case. This flight should be cake 😉 as my brother Ki would say lol. I’m going to miss it here but I know I’ll be back either to just visit, surgery, or someone elses support :D.

10:15am GMT/4:15 am EST:
Arrival at the airport was swift. Dorde gets me a luggage cart and then I pay him in USD $20 for the trip to the airport. I proceed inside still walking very well no issues no pain but very slowly. I check in my baggage get my boarding passes and head upstairs to the terminal. So far so good BUT all the friction from walking is making my nut itch something horrible :(. Through the metal detectors easy as well as customs and I find my gate, C5. I feel the need to tinkle so finding the bathroom is on the to do list first. Luckily it’s en route to the gate. I’m happy because even though it’s not my penis I’m using to stand at the urinal I’m still able to do so without fear of drainage down my leg. A brother is very content :D. I make way to my gate all the while my nuts are on fire! Go figure there’s no pain but I would catch an itch attack when there are people around. I don’t want to just bust out scratching my nuts but good lord I feel like doing so right about now. I put my changing supplies in my bag so if need be I can freshen up in the airplanes toilet with my travel wipes. After my fast turtle walking I’m at my gate I find a seat and wait for them to open the gate.

11:55am GMT/5:55am EST:
Boarding time, normally they board you earlier but the scan machine for the passports was on the fritz lol. Hell I rather that the snow delays. It’s actually rather warm today so I’m not complaining at all. It should be smooth sailing from here to Germany. I got to freshen up and pee at the gate bathroom so nads feel a lot better than before :D. Gotta put this in airplane mode and off for a sec during taxi. In the air I go!

2pm GMT/8am EST:
Flight was smooth nothing to really report. Pain was zero beside a few spasms here and there but for the majority of the flight I was sleep lol. I’m now on the shuttle bus to the terminal so I can find my gate and a toilet. I don’t feel the need to go but I’m sure there’s something in my bladder. Better safe the sorry as they as ways say.

2:44pm GMT/8:44am EST:
Well I should have known I wouldn’t get completely home without some sort of events lol. I made my turtle speed walk through Frankfurt airport, this is one big got damn airport I know that much. None the less I had to find the train tithe other side of the airport where my gate was, check. Walked all the winding stairs and hallways to the check point, oh here comes the fun. As per usual I take everything out of the appropriate places, belt off, comp and electronics out. I told the silly ass gate personnel my shoes had metal in them but oh no they insisted I keep them on. I walk through the scanner and no shit it goes off. So now I have to play acrobatics during my pat down, needless to say they are already looking at me crazy because I’m walking like I have a brick of c-4 in my draws lol. He scans me with the metal detector and makes me sit down and take off my shoes. He scans my feet, I believe my socks have metal fibers or something they are gold toe socks. He then says ok and takes my shoes and puts them through X-ray, we could have avoided this all together if he would’ve just listened when I said they had metal Smh. They see there is nothing there on the scan, duh! So I proceed to gather my stuff and I notice one attendant is standing with my electronics bin, he said iPods need to go through a special test. Jeezues! Are they building iPod bombs now?! The test literally was holding some sort metal paper to my iPod, they better not have messed up anything lol. Then I’m sent on my way pushing through the crowded airport filled with cots seeing as though flights have been leaving people stranded in amounts surpassing capacity of the surrounding hotels. I’m looking for a toilet at this point I feel the tingle. I finally find the bathroom, that’s small as hell, another guy was at the urinal so I hit the stall. And guess what I discover? During my pat down the officer freaking loosened up my catheter clamp and the shit had a slow leak. UGHHHHH! Good thing I keep an extra pair of undies just because so it’s time to changed and clean up, thank you security just what I wanted for Xmas Smh. After I get all fresh I head out to my gate and here I shall sit until 5:30pm GMT/11:30 am EST. My nuts are a bit achy but that’s expected walking 15 years across the airport lol. At least I know when it’s time for the PCP check up walking and subway in NYC will be easy as hell just turtle paced lol.

5:24pm GMT/11:24am EST:
Knowing I should have boarded with the elderly I let everyone go first. I’m in an aisle seat, next international flight def will be first or business class. I’m situated next to a lady and her kids they aren’t pleased oh well. My nads are now getting sore, so for the sake of sleep and sanity it’s time to medicate. Not sure how sleep will go but I’m going to attempt. Well after they feed me of course lol. My annoyance level is peaking as well but I think it’s due to my nads being tender. 8 hours to go until I’m in the states.

6:53pm GMT/ 12:53pm EST:
Just wanted to make a report on this flight. Lufthansa is definitely the best airline I have been on thus far! German beer with my pretzels, in-flight movies of a wide variety of new features as well as tv shows and music, the monitors are all touch screen! Note to self Amsterdam flight planned for summer will be on Lufthansa! I think I will be looking for jobs in my new career field that allow me to travel abroad. I have really fell in love with Europe :D. Now waiting on in-flight dinner. As well I took a pain pill to take the ache off I feel a lot better now.

7:59pm GMT/1:59pmEST:
Yes officially I must write a review for Lufthansa they are awesome. Chicken, rice, veggies, salad, beer and wine. I love this airline! Lol I am going to sleep well soon. No pain I’m relaxed and enjoying the in-flight movies! This will be the airline if choice when going for the long haul of the international flight. Both European regional flights I took were very nice as well, America what’s the deal?

12:39am GMT/6:39pm EST:
Back over northern America as per the in-flight map. Duration of the rest of the trip is about 1:35 mins. I can not wait to get off this damn plane lol. I’m just waking up for the in-flight snack and to use the rest room. So far so good no leaks from unexpected catheter unblocking. I do think it’s a bit funny how my urethra isn’t bleeding at the moment. Maybe it likes this altitude lmao.

3:13am GMT/9:13pm EST:
WELCOME HOME! we touch down and of course I’m still half out of it lol. Excited to get off the plane I am the first one to get up, well that is after we spent 30 mins on the runway waiting for another plane to leave the terminal lol. I proceed to passport control walking faster than I was thinking to myself I’m going to pay for this later but for now I was on a mission. I get to passport control no real issues the lady just asked why I left I said surgery and I went on my way. As I am getting off the escalator for the baggage claim another officer approaches me who followed me down the escalator and asked to see my passport again asking me why I went to Serbia. By now I know the questions are because the way I’m walking so I’m fully prepped to show surgical docs lol.

My bag is the last bag out, go figure lol. And I notice the handles are open, I’ll explain my theory for that shortly. After I get my bag the same officer is at baggage control, now he wants more info. At this point in my life I don’t care so I tell him genital surgery, he gets this “oh now the hobbling walk makes sense” look on his face. He then goes from defense mode to sympathatic. He asked how did things go and if I was ok to walk or did i need a chair, I said yea i’m soldier I got it lol. Then they waved me through.

I called my bro who was at a different terminal and met him outside, FYI those flying to EWR all international flights arrive at terminal B. And home I went. I missed my big bro we had excellent convo on the drive home.

11:00pm EST:
I’m finally in the house, and I talk to my grandma for a bit. She’s very happy to see me and tells me everyone has been calling to make sure I got in safe. After our talk I come to wash up, at this point my nuts are very very sore and I feel the sweat. So I get all fresh and look in my bit bag and notice the pocket with my Cialis in it is open. AH HA! Now I know why customs kept asking me stuff it probably tripped a scanner so they checked it out, no biggie either way I had a letter for it. Now was time to eat and hydrate seeing as though my catheter was murky with a little blood. That just meant I need more fluid in my bladder.

Over all my travel day wasn’t bad at all. Happy to be home with my new thoughts on the brain. I want a job that allows me to frequent and/or live in Europe!

Ok now I sleep…


  1. Tee says:

    Glad you made it safe and sound enjoy your holidays and bring in your New Years with a bang. Hope to be like you soon enough, enjoyed all the information you have provided. Feel like your journey has brought me a new hope.

    • toyneboi says:

      thanks man! In due time it will be you to man dont worry about it. In time everyone gets just what we need just stay focused on what you want and it will happen right on time. 😀

  2. QC says:

    Welcome home, man! Like me you probably miss Belgrade, lol, but enjoy being home.
    Be well and heal!

  3. Joshua says:

    Welcome Home! (And I mean that in more ways than one!) I’m so happy for you. Now, rest up!

  4. Rob says:

    Welcome home!

  5. I’m glad you are home. Welcome back! See you soon

  6. Samuel Clarke says:

    Very happy to hear you are back safe and sound 🙂 You have
    had an incredible journey this year…now on to 2011 🙂 !!

  7. Blaq says:

    welcome home…. I’m interested in your recovery!

  8. Nice piece of facts that you’ve got in this website submit. Hope I can get some much more of this stuff on your weblog. I’ll occur back.

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